I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
I need to get all the one night tinders in my system before I move back in with my parents
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
