I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Yeah I'm buying him lunch right now because I shot him with the fire extinguisher last night
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Tequila ran out around 11 so she let them do body shots of chips and guacamole instead
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
