Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He's both a cowboy and a firefighter. Saying "no" was not an option.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
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