I need a shot of tequila, and quick death
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
sorry like um she made me hold her puke bag while she peed in front of me is that better
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
this hospital has no fireball
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
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