I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
gonna sleep on the stairs... to drunk to keep going up, way to drunk to go down, gonna find a comfy spot right here... its safer that way
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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