I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
Randomize
