They should really pass out barf bags in church
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
you're a mystery wrapped in an enigma. wrapped inside a burrito.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
The fact that he quoted freebird as his breakup speech was a little more classy than expected
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
When my parents ask, do you think "he was the cop I gave head to in order to get out of a speeding ticket" will suffice as to how we met?
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
