No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
how do you tell someone you stalk them in a non-creepy way
you don't.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
I shit you not, me and my date were in that bar and within a 10 minute window, 4 ex gf's entered. Every one clocked me and gave me evils. I swear they're conspiring.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He's high as balls tripping balls and doing a reenactment of the scene where Buzz jumps off the balcony and can't fly to his soundtrack of Toy Story.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
You can't leave me alone in times of distress because I will fuck things 🙈😐
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I'm not going to tell you how to live your life, which includes naming your schlong
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
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