omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
i just figured out how to balance my wine bottle on my boobs so that i don't have to tip it with my hands...breathing has new meaning
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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