If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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