so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
I swear ... this hickey is a map to Amelia Earhart's whereabouts
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
I need a conscience and I need it yesterday.
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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