the ugly redhead just came into the bar, wearing a sombrero...by herself... who is going to tell her that its not cool to throw themed parties when you're the only guest?
he spent the whole night trying to convince me into a2m. i won't even use the pb til i clean the jelly knife. i love him but it's not going to happen.
On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
Totally just grabbed the wrong dick. Damn this tequila.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
