hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
