Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I smell like Dick and happiness
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