Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
