just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
So I was talking to her on the phone last night and had to mute it so I could take a crap.
Side Note: My mute button doesn't work.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
You screamed "i promise ill stop blowing your brother" in the middle of a packed restaurant at 1pm. We should maybe rethink our relationship.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Masturbating to death wouldn't be a terrible way to go. If you die tonight, I'll know how it went down. Promise not to tell your family.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
