Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
What's that word that means bigger and smaller and bigger and smaller, again?
Goddamn it, Jaime, it's 4am. Throbbing. The word is throbbing.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I'm potentially being cockblocked by Old Man Winter. What the fuck did I do to piss off an entire season?
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
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