You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Dude she flew me 1000 miles down to see her, broke up with me 7 hrs after arrival, and kicked me out with a week left til I fly home. Thank god college taught me how to shack up
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
