I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
I'm like a rollypolly, I only open my legs up when I feel safe.
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
we're making bets on your personal life
I put bits of fruit cocktail in the jello shots i made because i knew that they were gonna be the only thing we ate all day
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
Randomize