So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
I left my Bacardi and dignity in your freezer. Will come get it later.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
Randomize
