the new term for farting is butt boxing.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
The calves of my jeans are covered in jello shots from Sunday, how desperate do I have to be before I start licking them?
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
As of right now, my vibrator and a bag of snickers share the same drawer
Randomize
