Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
She left a blunt and poutine on my nightstand with a note saying "went to the gym. be ready for round three when I get back" I love Canadian chicks
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
Randomize
