i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Halfway through missionary I realized I was partially laying on his sleeping dog and idk that just kinda ruined it for me sooo
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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