she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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