You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I went on a psycho cleaning spree so I feel I've earned the right to spend the day in bed watching porn and eating sausage biscuits. If you bring alcohol you can join me.
All other girlfriends are inferior. You are the chosen one.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize