let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
constantly striving to make life awkward and more complicated, one drunk bone at a time.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
in the midst of studying i picked up my capsule full of untouched weed, popped it open, and whispered "soon" into it. midterms man
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
Randomize