I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
It's just weird. It's like Big Bird dating Meg Griffin.
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
The psychic I saw today told me NOT to text the guy I haven't heard from yet since our first date this weekend b/c it wouldn't go anywhere...Miller light said otherwise. Miller light > Cleo
He stood me up and then his cat died. I feel like this is Gods way of saying he's on my side, even after the tequila fiasco.
I'm keeping track of how many times I've said "Shhh, act like you're not naked." in my life. So far, 3 times.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
So here I am, sexting at work.
Randomize