I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I am way too attached to fictional lesbians.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
Randomize
