They have to be talking about me. I never heard that statement until I was born.
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
i figured out i could get from the downstairs bar to the upstairs bar AND grab pizza by going through the kitchen. it was the greatest discovery of my life besides the flabongo.
I feel like I'm in an ocean of eels jacking me off
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I just bought emergency deodorant at Dominick's and put it on in front of a homeless man while waiting for the bus. He laughed and said 'girl, you a mess'. This is my life.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
