bang him and never speak to him again. also, queef in his face.
i dont this its possible to queef on command.
I am not hooking up with him just to see what his penis looks like.
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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