i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I feel like on the last day of finals we should run around campus dressed like Moses screaming "LET MY PEOPLE GO!!!!"
I'll start the recruiting
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
So when the drug raid cops tell you, you should get out of the relationship, it probably means its time.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
Randomize
