how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I just saw her take the entire bowl of lime wedges from the bar and pour them all in her purse, and now using the empty bowl as a hat. Waiting for security to come and throw her ass out.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
He's eating a sriracha ravioli sandwich. How do you think the night is going?
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
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