Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
in light of our recent drunken behavior, i think it's time we seriously consider hiring ourselves a babysitter.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
Nothing can teach you regret more efficiently than a wine hangover.
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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