No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
question: from what angle do you give a hand job. im confused..
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
we decided it was best to cut you off after we caught you trying to "baptize" my cat in the jungle juice
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
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