My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
he kept asking me if i had been in a pool or a lake recently, i didnt want to say i know where the swimmers ear came from. shower sex.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
Zach, it's Lisa from work. Was that you yeiling BALLS DEEP at me on I-25 or is it just something about me that invites that from rando creeps?
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
MIDGETS
????
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
On my way to return shoes I bought so that I can afford to buy a pregnancy test. Is this adulthood?
Randomize
