Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I can't find my keys and there's a hotdog in my purse.
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
Randomize
