Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
I have said "that's the wrong hole" for the last time.
Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Got hit on by the cable guy. Solid 9. Think Orlando Bloom with a glorious curly mullet.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I'm watching Trainwreck with Jeff and realizing that I'm the John Cena in my relationship.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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