pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
Motor boating, judging by the amount of lipstick I found I would say between 6 to 8 times
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Our date was amazing and I would like to reward you with a blow job under your desk.
I can pencil you in at 3:30
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize
