morning outfit: hottub soaked skirt. no underwear. someone's bandanna worn as a shirt. took me an hour to walk home. this isn't fun anymore.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
