You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
Instead of asking if I had a condom she literally said " I'm not on the pill but I'm pro choice... your move"... I'm in love
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
I'm not sure...it could be the pasta I ate from her sink, the dominoes, or just the alcohol. Or a wicked combination of all 3.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Just missed the last train for another 5 hours. There are balls in or around the mouth of my life.
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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