Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
Dude your neighbors are having a garage sale. They were judging me as I walk of shamed back to my car.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
You showed up to your dad's bday dinner late, dirty, and hungover then proceeded to yell at the bartender for trying to take advantage of you by putting extra bourbon in your drink... Highly doubt you win best daughter award.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
How have you never felt a dick as hard as mine?
Is there any reason why a taxidermic donkey head is in the shower?
Randomize