If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Dude, you were so drunk last night that when we went into subway, you forgot the word for bread.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
You left your underwear on the fireplace
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
Upon further investigation my nipples are bruised and I have teeth marks all over.
Randomize