Everytime she opens her mouth it's like a fucking terrorist attack on my life.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
