What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
you kept spraying the cat with water and then telling it to "man up" when it cried
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
For the record, rock bottom is where you start crying during porn because your ex used to slap your ass like that.. Continue on with your day now.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
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