Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Dear vodka that I hid in a water bottle in the backseat of Blairs car, I'm sorry that she gave you away to a man on side of the road with an over heated engine. I'm sure the car doesn't appreciate you as much as I would have.
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
You just stood up, raised your glass and said, "I'd like to thank the academy" then fell through a glass table. THAT'S why we cut you off.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
Randomize
