They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
it was great that she threw up because that made me the only one trying to hook up with her
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
