Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
don't thank me. stop putting your penis in foreign objects.
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
I'm not saying I'm drunk, but I'm definitely saying my liver has its work cut out for it.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
In other news, people don't judge you when you buy a vibrator if you buy a funny birthday card and bag with it. I learned that this weekend.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize