You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
Randomize
