I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
WHY ARE YOU POKING HOLES IN MY 3AM LOGIC?!
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
