it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
Open the door and I will lure them out to freedom with viagra and candy orange slices. You know they love that shit.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
I had sex while watching Lord of the Rings last night. I think I just reached a new level of nerd.
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
