never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
Drunk and had dance off with 8 year old. Lost. Still drinking
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
This electrician is just ripping my house apart and I'm too hungover to ask questions
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Her cat was breathing in my ear all night, like that kid from Hey Arnold.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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