Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
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